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Modern Manners Monday – Unruly Kid
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Dear DMM: Last weekend we attended a community event sponsored by a local bank. They had food, bounce houses for the kids and lots of other activities including a guy who making balloon animals. It should have been a really fun event.
There was one kid who was incredibly unruly. He was knocking younger kids down. Swearing. Even playing to rough with some of the other kids. He was just acting like a menace in general. In other words, he was a brat.
He was also a brat without supervision. His parents were not around anywhere. We never saw this kid once with his parents. There were no other kids there without supervision except this child.
At one point he was stomping up and down on the balloon animal that he had just had made. Then he was taunting children. After watching him knock down a few more small children (not my own), I told the kid that he really should calm down and try to be a little nicer to the young kids.
The kid told me, “My dad works at this bank and I can do anything that I want.”
Here is the thing. This is a quarterly event that my family really enjoyed up until now. We go every three months. Our neighbor went by the event hours later and the kid was still out there, without parent supervision, still being menace in general to everyone he came across.
He ruined this event for us and we are not planning to go back. Should I say something to the bank? My kids will be really upset the next time we drive by and I tell them that we can't go back. I am really annoyed.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
Give Advice on our previous Modern Manners Monday posts:
Kids & Swag or Giveaways – When is it Enough?
I would call the bank and ask to speak to whoever is in charge of planning these events. I would tell them the situation and see what they say. It’s very possible that they have no idea that employees are letting their kids run around like hellions.
I think that is a great idea. Thanks for your input!
I would report it.
He was unsupervised. His parents are neglectful. I would tell them that next time you see him unsupervised and unwatched in public, you will call the police for his safety.
I definitely think so too. Thanks Penelope.
I am not from the East Coast. I did live in Tennessee for two years so I am familiar with southern hospitality. I now live in the mid-west and am familiar with the “minnesota-nice”.
I would have called the police as well. It is a “hassle” to get involved but for the safety of other kids, the boy’s parents need to be present.
That’s a really tough one. I guess I’d probably let it go (whilst steaming!)
I would call the bank first, then if nothing is done about it, I would call the police.
Hmmm. I’m not sure what I would do in that instance but you’re right, he seemed very unruly. I guess if you should attend again mention it then. It’s now after the fact and notthing much may come out of it. Too bad your day was spoiled.
Definitely report it….
As with the other bad manner situations you have brought to our attention, no one will do this kid any favors if everyone overlooks the bad behavior. He will most likely grow up a kid who not only thinks he is born with a silver spoon in his mouth but thinks is OK to “feed and dish out” bullying, rudeness and even physical abuse to others his age and even others. Can you imagine the disrespect this child gives a teacher…his parents? Wow…this is just disaster waiting to happen and it wont take til he is a late teen either. You never really stated how old you thought this kid was but no matter…if he is this far gone he needs some intervention NOW . Hopefully some of this can be brought under control with some structure and better, more watchful parenting.
I would also WRITE a letter to the bank thanking them again for the event and that you are one family of many that looks forward to this. I would then say they might want to have it brought to their attention that there was a very unruly and bullish child that seemed to be unattended and other children had their safety compromised. Not to mention this child was defiant to other adults trying to help. Without naming the person they might ask around and see who this might have been…and if they inquire, I would simply give them a description of the child and what age he may have been and what he was wearing. Maybe you could suggest them hiring “playground” supervisors for the games if they know not all kids are going to be able to be attended to. I am sure this would get some conversation going and suggest that you are a very grateful community participant and would not want their reputation scarred by something that could go very wrong at a future event. I know that sounds a bit over the top…but the truth is that bullies will take a mile if given an inch and someone WILL be hurt eventually…obviously in a very physical way and not “only” hurt feelings.
I have to say though…this little guy might even have his parents snowed. We used to call them Eddie Haskels and they can play all the games right and come out smelling like a rose, even while in the shadows they are the most manipulating and troublemaker types. He might be so spoiled with THINGS and not attention and that is unfortunate too. Either way, this kids needs a SERIOUS time out…for like a year. LOL! Hope it all gets worked out before the next event…sounds like a FUN community outing!
I would definitely talk to the bank about this! I would have scolded that child too, I don’t care! If a kid is unsupervised and is acting out that way, you bet your bottom I will say something to that child!
I would have disciplined that child right away if he was harming other kids!
And I would have reported him to someone at the bank. If they are sponsoring the event, there should have been employees around. My husband works at a bank and does these events and he would definitely have put a stop to that ASAP if that was one of his employees kids doing that unsupervised.
I also would ask to speak to the person who handles the events at the bank. There is no good reason a child of an employee or any child should be unsupervised at a public event. If it was an employees child, the employee should have been one of the people overseeing the happenings & would have known their kid was being a pain!
i would speak to someone at the bank and also feel that if kids don’t learn early, it’s just setting them up for a future full of the same type of behavior. It’s so important to model good behavior in my opinion.
I have Grandchildren and thank goodness, my daughters in laws have taught our grandkids how to behave well in public. The unruly child event is an opportunity to praise your own children or grandkids ( I’m so proud of you____ for not acting that way), then telling other family members later ( with the child present) how well behaved he or she was.