Here it is, the first of May and for over one month, (yes, that is correct) I have been stressing about Teacher Appreciation Gifts. I mean really spending time every day devoted to thinking,...
Handed Down from Mother to Daughter
There are many things that I got from my mother. Some I wish that I hadn't and others…well you can definitely tell that they came from my mother. I don't have her eyes. I don't have her smile. I don't even have her coloring. In fact, I look nothing like her. I sure wish that I had her legs but apparently I have some Russian bodybuilder in me those came from my dad's side of the family.
For a long time, there is not much that I would claim came from my mother because for over 30 years, we had a pretty rocky relationship. She was (and still is) depressed. She has suffered from depression ever since I can remember and refuses to acknowledge it or take medicine for it. Although it is her choice, she has tumultuous relationships with pretty much everyone in her life. She and my sister haven't really been close in years.
I suffer from depression too. I have had it for years but I take medicine daily and it has changed my life for the better. The medicine puts me on a more even keel. What would before be tumultuous or turbulent is now channeled into passion. Passion for my children. Passion for my husband (we do have three kids). Passion for life. So I thank my mother for that. It is ok that I have depression. I am a normal person and I have learned how to successfully manage it. I like my passion!
Both of my parents have dark coloring with brown eyes and dark brown hair. I have none of these things. I am fair skinned and look almost Irish (which makes sense because we are Scottish). My hair is reddish, blondish brown and my eyes are blue. My sister used to tell me that I was the mailman's kid when we were young but I always knew that was untrue because the mailman was a female. I actually look like both of my grandmother's.
My mother is a dreamer and she is always going from one plan to another, one trip to another, etc. My father (they divorced after 30 years of marriage a few years ago) and I used to refer to it as flighty. She has so many interests that we could never keep anything straight. I am often the same way. I always refer to myself as a serial hobbyist because I go from craft to craft or hobby to hobby and never really finish anything. But I thank her for this because it is this serial hobbyist mentality that caused me to really focus on my writing which then led me to blogging.
My mother is artsy and kind of funky. She and I have very different ideas about fashion but we are from different generations. But it is because of these differences that led to my interest in beauty & fashion and I now write about it.
She has a dream catcher hanging from the rear view mirror of her car. It is teal and huge with a bunch of feathers. I hate this dreamcatcher, I find it embarrassing and I used to always take it down whenever I drive her car. Lately I leave it up because it reminds me of her and makes me smile at how ‘out there' she is.
I learned a long time ago that she would not change and if I wanted to have a good relationship with her, I would have to change or adapt to the person that she is. Because of this, I am probably closer to her than most people and this ability to adapt has also served me well in the business because I could work successfully with any type of boss.
My mother has handed down many things to me. Although I don't have her eyes, her smile or even her coloring, I have a piece of her heart. She would do anything in the world for my children and loves them so much. This is one of the things that I really love about her.
So to my not-so-perfect, depressed, flighty, artsy, funky, dreamer mother, I say thank you and that I love you. Happy Mother's Day! A big part of the person that I am today is because of you and I wouldn't change a thing.